This week’s underground hip-hop track of the week is Phillip Morris’ The MILF Song – and it’s definitely not about what you think it’s about. This song had me cracking up on the train today, and is one of many creative tracks from Phillip Morris’ “The Process of Addiction Has Its Costs.” Click below to listen:

And be sure to follow along with the lyrics after the break.

[Verse 1]
Damn mama you’ve got a nice interface/
And your processor can handle some high centigrade/
But I bet I could still make you overheat/
Come roam the seas with this pirate and whatever we find and download we keep/
I wanna go to sleep beside you and wake up to you/
Au natural you don’t need no makeup do you?/
I wanna take you out, let you order off attractive menus/
Upgrade the date and shove this stick of RAM up in you/
I know I work you hard, but it’s for a purpose honey/
Plus that [bleep] noise you make when you curse is funny/
Besides this, you’re relatively quiet/
Sometimes you like to hum but I don’t mind it/
You find it quite disturbing when I don’t give you the attention of a deserving lover/
I try to read ahead and keep abreast with sturdy buffers/
Turned you off is what I guess that I did/
‘Cause now you’re acting all password protected and shit/

[Chorus]
She says I’m pushing her buttons quite enough-nuff/
Keeping track of all my shit is mighty rough-ruff/
She’s kinda old so I criticize the dust-dust/
But you’re still the only motherboard I’d like to fuck-fuck/
Even though there’s newer models I ain’t up-up/
I’m a broke nigger and those bitches cost too much-much/
One or two might end up on my lap on the hush-hush/
But you’re still the only motherboard I’d like to fuck-fuck/

[Verse 2]
Yesterday’s vigilante, crosshairs blastin’/
Impressing dates with a fancy software package/
Let me at least install this demo, just a tip of the trial version/
Um, I just wanna see if these files work and/
I predict high compatibility/
You’ve got all the requirements that I demand and killer speed/
You’re feeling me?/
I was a flashy type of player with a sizeable zip drive/
She lived above that photo shop, her click’s tight with QuickTime/
Old school file extensions that could pass for dreads/
But she don’t fuck with ProTools ‘cause she’s an acidhead/
Small frame doesn’t even take up half the bed/
A kleptomaniac she’s hacking with a masked address/
But a guilty conscience makes her depressed/
She’s asking why I couldn’t just buy her those automated effects/
I don’t mean to be mean but I needed some rest/
Baby please for now just zip it and keep it compressed/

[Chorus]
She says I’m pushing her buttons quite enough-nuff/
Keeping track of all my shit is mighty rough-ruff/
She’s kinda old so I criticize the dust-dust/
But you’re still the only motherboard I’d like to fuck-fuck/
Even though there’s newer models I ain’t up-up/
I’m a broke nigger and those bitches cost too much-much/
One or two might end up on my lap on the hush-hush/
But you’re still the only motherboard I’d like to fuck-fuck/

[Verse 3]
I love the way she multitasks/
Let me feel your USB ports/
Let me get you drunk enough/
That you don’t mind networking with another hub/
Let me caress your touchpad/
Defragment your clusters/
I like the sex sloppy/
Plus you’re looking extra hot in those Ethernet stockings/
Knock the dust off your chipset/
You’re gonna need another cooling fan/
Slow it down do it half speed/
Lots of junk in the trunk but the front’s a flat screen/
I’m in love with a power stripper/
Tap that ass at sixty words per minute/
I know this might seem sick/
Strike a pose mama and now just let me take a screenprint/

[Chorus]
She says I’m pushing her buttons quite enough-nuff/
Keeping track of all my shit is mighty rough-ruff/
She’s kinda old so I criticize the dust-dust/
But you’re still the only motherboard I’d like to fuck-fuck/
Even though there’s newer models I ain’t up-up/
I’m a broke nigger and those bitches cost too much-much/
One or two might end up on my lap on the hush-hush/
But you’re still the only motherboard I’d like to fuck-fuck/