When I take a crap, I read – a lot. I’ve read whole novels in one sitting. I like to tell people that I do it to maximize my time. In truth, I think that if I took as long on the john as most people say they do, I probably wouldn’t have enough time to really get through more than a few sentences.

But if most people crapped like they say they do, why do I keep finding Entertainment Weekly and MotoSports in the crapper at work? Because most people read on the crapper. This brings me to my point.  

I noticed the latest issue of US in the work bathroom this week and, being that I’m current on all issues of Time magazine (ie, Cosmo), I started reading US. It makes me pretty sick. I don’t really get why people are so involved in other people’s business. Really, what do I care that Britney Spears got a boob job, or Bono lost another Gerbil in his anus? How does any of this affect me? Why should any of this interest me?

Being an occasional contributor to the best online hip-hop magazine in the world ever-ever, I do browse a lot of different media to keep up to date on what’s happening outside of my own hip-hop community. One website that I frequent, mainly because it is the first link when I search “hip hop news,” is allhiphop.com. It has a section in it called “The Rumor section.” I, admittedly, read this section because it’s “what’s happening in the world of Hip Hop.” But actually, nothing in that section really matters. Some of last week’s topics included, “Bow Wow Goes Off?” and “Common and Serena CHILL!” Who gives a damn? How does this affect the Hip Hop community? Are people better off knowing any of this information? Is hip-hop better off with this information public?

Thursday, this same site interviewed Method Man and, speaking from a very honest place, he absolutely aired them out. Below is a brief snippet of the interview:

Method Man: I got to give ya’ll compliments on the site. AllHipHop.com stays on top of the grizzly man but ya’ll put a lot of hack s**t up there too.

AllHipHop.com: What do you mean?Method Man: Ya’ll be on some bulls**t sometimes.

AllHipHop.com: Well this is your chance to speak your mind. Air it out.

Method Man: Like some people be putting up half truths and s**t like that. That’s hack s**t right there son.

AllHipHop.com: Are you referring to Illseed’s rumor section?

Method Man: Yeah, that’s hack s**t right there for real. That be f***ing with people’s lives. Ya’ll should put up a disclaimer on there. Because there are more dumb people than smart people in this world and they take that s**t as a gospel.

Needless to say, yesterday was about the fourth time that I thanked God for Method Man (to clarify, the first three times all came before the release of “How High” the movie). Method Man points out that “rumors” get that name because they’re rumors, and a lot of times they’re unfounded.

A rumor is a rumor, and a chickenhead is a chickenhead. The world would be better off with less of both. Keep in mind, though, that allhiphop.com has those sections because people click them. So if you want those sections to be a thing of the past, then don’t click them. There are a lot more important things in the world for us to focus on. To quote Eleanor Roosevelt, “Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.” 

Friday, allhiphop.com had a disclaimer:

DISCLAIMER De METHOD MAN:

All content within this section is pure rumor and generally have no factual info outside of what the streets have whispered in our ear. Read on.

That’s pretty funny and kudos, I guess, to the site for putting up the disclaimer… but the sections still up there, isn’t it?

Keep it Movin!

- Profit